The Enemy Is Not Who You Think.

0:00 Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, the authorities, the powers of this dark world, and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Good evening, small group. Welcome to Bomber Sticker Wisdom.

0:52 I am John. I am Terry. It's so nice to have you guys today. It is episode 140. We're creeping up on 150, which is a huge milestone, in my opinion. I don't know about anybody else, but I think if I really think about it for a minute, I think episode one is the biggest milestone, honestly. Absolutely. If you really think about it, because the hardest part of doing a thing is starting. You know what I mean? And we're still kicking. The fact that we're almost about to complete rotation around the sun for the third consecutive time we've been doing this is pretty incredible to me. Still love doing it. Still happy to be here. Still happy to be here with you guys. Before we get going too far, I will say a quick little prayer. Heavenly Father, we thank you as always for giving us this time and this opportunity and just giving us the vision to do something with it, Father God, to not just waste it. Father, we just want to lift ourselves up, submit ourselves to you, submit our tongues to you, allow our thoughts to be on things that are of you and for you, Father God, and for your kingdom, Father.

1:59 And anybody who chooses to listen right now, that they get something, some piece of meat that just nourishes them and feeds them and gives them hope and reason to seek after you, Father. Because we know that when we seek, we will find you, Father. It's in Jesus' name we pray. Amen. So, I have no idea what to talk about, but... There's personal things, but I don't really want to talk about those. I mean, I guess you can in a roundabout way. The reason I started with that scripture today is just to be reminded that we're not fighting people. Yeah, absolutely. You know, we always focus on what we think is our enemy. Yeah, and it's not. And the truth is you. Aren't my enemy. It's ideas. It's issues within this world. Things that are now acceptable in this world that aren't necessarily acceptable.

2:53 And, you know, you and I both know in relationship there's a lot of give and take. Sometimes a lot more take than give. Sometimes a lot more give than take. One or the other. Maybe both at the same time. No relationship is perfect. Absolutely it's not. They all have their issues. And sometimes there's collateral damage for the crap that we've been through in life. And sometimes you're confronted with that, you know what I mean, with the fact that the things you dealt with caused damage to other people even, even though in the time you didn't even think it was, you were only focused on you. Sorry. Every time we come into podcast.

3:34 I know. My hair lately is just like, when I put that brace on, I feel like it. It's constricting. It constricts me and I feel like, I don't feel like I'm damaged. I feel like when I put it on, it's like. I'm joking. Yeah. You know, I don't feel like it. I don't know. It's just really weird. But I'm healing well. You are healing well. I'm doing really well. So I'll go to the doctor in two days. I'm so excited. She's ready to be out of here. He's still going to. I can't drive. He's probably going to tell me I can't. It'll be all right. I'm going to be all right. I get to go back to work. I'm so excited. She's tired of being around here. That's for sure. For sure. Now do what you need to do. Okay. You have to push me up there. You're like, get up there. Sorry, technical difficulties. Actually, technical annoyance. I can't. The sound matters to me. It doesn't to me. There you go. I can hear you now. Holy smokes. I know it doesn't matter to you, but to me it's a quality issue, right? I totally understand that. I get it. Perfect.

4:41 I get it. It's not perfect, man. But if you can do it better, why not? I do hear what you hear. You can hear it now. I do. I do hear it. But geez, you have to push. It was like. That was just being a smart ass. I was just picking on you. See, now you turned it away from you. I'll fix it. But I was trying to be a smarty pants. But you were just like. Blipper. Just kidding. It might be. It might be. You know what I'm finding out here the last few weeks? Oh, sorry. In editing, I've just been trying to change it up a little bit, kind of the style and what we get out of it, not being too rigid on what comes out of it. I try to have three content clips and two funnies. Sometimes you have two funnies. Sometimes you don't. I'm really funny. What I find is more often than not, the funniest stuff has nothing to do with the jokes we tell and stuff like that.

5:39 It usually ends up being how we mess with each other. A lot of people always tell me, you were so funny. I'm like, my joke? They're like, no, your joke was not funny. I'm like, hey, I'm very funny. But anyway, I think it's a good time to be reminded that the enemy is not people. The enemy is literally... Things that have been going on. It's ideals. It's ideas. It just hurts. It's all kinds of different things for people, you know. I mean, it's a lot of different things, you know. So, yeah. But that's not who we fight. We fight against. Not flesh and blood. It's spirits.

6:21 Things that are even unseen. It even says unseen. Yeah. You know, that's hard for us to grasp. Absolutely. Because we're such a literal species. If it's not literal or tangible anymore, it's not real. Yeah, absolutely. Or something like that. And you can't teach people that either. Right. Because they don't understand. Yeah, for sure. You know, so, yeah. I totally get it. Yeah. So anytime going forward. I want us to be reminded whenever we're getting frustrated with somebody or even not just frustrated but angry and want to lash out at somebody, they aren't the enemy.

7:01 Right. If we could direct our focus on the real enemy, maybe we'd get a little further. Yeah, absolutely. So that's why I brought that scripture up today. I don't know if our conversation will center around all that today. I just know that we need to be protected. We need to be mindful of those kinds of things. We're meant to love everybody. We do. It's hard sometimes, though. It's really hard. It's hard because sometimes you want to love them, but then it's like you look at them and it's like, I don't want to punch you. In your face, yeah, 100%. You know, I mean, and sometimes they don't know. Yeah. What they say or what they did. Cause you're like, you're like, what? I don't know what I did. Don't even realize it. Yeah. And they don't. And it's like, you're like, really? And you're like, okay, give grace, give grace. Cause they do not know what they did. You know what I'm saying? So much easier said than done. It is. That's another thing too.

8:02 Like if you, you, you, you touched on it when, when crisis, I mean, he's at the end of brutality. You know what I mean? I mean, at the peak of pain and suffering, he literally asked God to forgive him for what they were doing because they didn't even know. They had no idea what they were doing. They didn't even realize it. You know what I mean? It is crazy. It's very crazy. It's huge. You know what I mean? If you start wrestling on it for even for a minute, it gets so big so fast that, you know, I think about. I think about the demons that I've struggled with in my lifetime and praise God for his patience.

8:48 Yeah. You know what I mean? It's like you and Brittany, y 'all talk about y 'all's past, and I just look at it going, golly, I don't see how you're... I don't want to say not here. I just don't see. Yeah, I get it. It's just hard to look at y 'all today to see what y 'all give me. I'm like, dude, the knowledge y 'all give me. Like I was telling you the other day, like I messed up 10 minutes. And like Brittany said, hey, it's the 10 minutes. Okay, give yourself 10 more minutes. See if you can get through those 10 minutes. If you get through those 10 minutes, let's do. Let's do 20 minutes. And I'm like, okay, okay. And then 20 minutes. And let's do 30 minutes. And I've done so much better. It's like something was said about me talking something about one of the customers. And it wasn't that I wasn't talking mad mess, but it was talking about barring one of the people, and it's how I was presenting it, like how the guy got barred.

9:54 Because the guy thought she was flirting. Not on her part, but it was like, I don't think she meant like she was flirting. It was just like she was being friendly, but to him she was flirting. And someone took it, my words, and twisted it. And I was like, no. No, no, no. I was telling him that's why he got barred because that's what happened. And it was just misunderstanding. And it's just the one twist. It could be just a little. Yeah. And then it turns into a big misunderstanding. How quickly you're identifying the strength of the enemy is twisting God's word. Absolutely.

10:39 He did it to Eve in the garden, right? Yeah. Because what was the first question? The first question was, did God really say you can't eat from any tree in the garden? He didn't say that. And she even said that. No, he said we just can't eat from that one. Right, right. That one. And then he goes, now he's already made you doubt, though. He's already made you question something. Why that one? Yeah, why that one? It's because he doesn't want you to have what he has. What was this one sweeter than that one? Is this one better than that one? God's being selfish. Yeah, why that one? Sneaky mother. Yes, do you see? Yeah. Do you see? It's just a little twist. And it's like, so. So the guy that it's his wife, I don't know what they are, but anyway, he goes, well, I didn't think Terry would do that. And dude, I just prayed over you like two or three days before my surgery. Yeah. Not, it's not who I am. Yeah. You know? So it's like, dude, if I have a problem with you, I'm going to come to you. Okay. I'm going to come to you. I tell people all the time, like at work and I get accused of. always being angry because of my face and all that kind of stuff. Like, listen, if I'm mad at you, you're going to know. You're going to know. I promise you, you're going to know.

11:57 If I have a problem with you, you're going to know. I'm not the kind of guy that hides that kind of stuff. I'm just going to tell you to your face, like, hey, this is what's going on, and I'm not okay with it. You know what I mean? And that's just the way I, you know, I'm not saying it's right or wrong. I'm just saying that's the way I am, right? And maybe I, there are times I should be better at that. Trust me. I'd bite my tongue a lot more than I let on. Oh yeah. You know, but I'm sure I could be better. Well, all can be better. Okay. We could all be a lot better. You know what I'm saying? So, I mean, it's just still, we don't, we don't even give two thoughts to the power of our words anymore.

12:37 We really don't. Even, even those of us. who spend time actually thinking about that yeah we still don't really actually pay attention to our words like we should yeah you know what i'm saying like we really don't actually are you hearing a buzz yes believe it or not or oh it's probably the fan oh that's what it is yeah you hear you can just barely hear the airflow barely hear the just yeah um just because i'm hot but you are hot Yeah, thank you. Thank you. You are welcome. I'm dragging all of them in to look at me. That's what there is. That's why they're all coming on. That one is mine. You can have that one. I'm not going anywhere. I don't want no part of none of that drama. I promise you. I got enough crap going on in my life. I do not need that. So ladies or gents, either one, don't care. Stay away from me. And I ain't the one. I'm not the one. We are a train wreck.

13:42 I was telling the new bartender the other day, I was like, she was telling me her husband doesn't like the bar scene either. He just doesn't like it. My husband doesn't like the bar scene either. He just doesn't like any kind of whatever. And I said, when I started working here, they're like, oh, look. I'm just going to say fresh meat. And they're like, oh. Oh, you belong to Terry. He goes, John's like, no, my name is John. No, I'm John. Yeah, not Terry's. They're like, no, you belong to Terry. And they're like, that's Terry's. And he's like, hey, my name's John. I don't belong to Terry. I don't think we were dating. I don't think we were dating yet. Yeah, we were dating. We had to have been, yeah. Oh, yeah, 100%. I remember that so well. I was there, and those girls, they were kind of being, like you said, too, like I don't try to twist things up, right? Just because somebody's being nice or some girl's being nice doesn't mean she's flirting. But you said those girls are flirting with you. I was like, what? Yeah. What do you mean? I don't see that at all. I already had my stink on. It was like, you have the Terry stink. And they were like, that belongs to Terry.

14:55 And you were like. Hey. I'm a person, and my name is John. Yeah, I'm John. Yeah. I still laugh at that all the time. I think it's just so funny. And I was talking about Big V, her name is Vanessa. It doesn't matter if I don't say her name right. But, yes, and she's just like. Is it Vanessa? I think it's. It's not Vanessa. It's not Vanessa. I call her V. That's her name is Miss V. That's what I call her. And she just laughs. She goes, yeah, I think that's funny. I said, yeah, my husband doesn't think it's very funny. He hates this bar. Not that he hates it. He doesn't care for this place. I care about it because people that are dear to me own it and operate it. So, you know, I want to support it where I can. And so, you know, if you want to have an ice cold beer and chat with some friends, go to Polly's Pub. It's just not my favorite scene. You know what I mean? And there's a reason for it. There's some people there that I just can't associate with. You know what I mean? They just make my skin crawl. And I know that's wrong. And after a certain time, dude, you shouldn't be out that late anyway. Man, honestly, nothing good really happens after 10 p .m. You might as well be at home by that point. You know what I mean? I like the older. crowd that goes some of the older crowd that goes you know and they're pretty funny you know they're all like we hope you come back to barton nope and not doing this anymore yeah

16:28 it's just that we do it as you do it as a means of supporting your best friend you know what i mean and then trying to help them and their business and you know how they operate and how that how to operate and so you go in and you help train and you'll fill in here and there it's not a full -time gig I mean, having a little extra side money don't hurt. Yeah, it doesn't hurt. Especially in what we got going on in this world. Oh, I was so worried today. I was so worried today because I just, you know how this stuff goes. So our AC went out after we recorded last week. Oh, gosh, yes. And it's been out all week. I went and used $800 in credit to go freaking buy some ACs. For the windows. For windows. And it's not enough to cool the house down. And it's brutally hot. Between 98 and 106 every day. It's been terrible. I just had a funky feeling. I put a window unit here. Now, this was going to be much louder if I had to have that in the window for tonight. And I just knew they were going to show up at like 4 o 'clock because the window was from 12 to 4. Yeah. Right? I just knew they were going to show up at like 4 o 'clock. They weren't going to have the part. They're going to have to order the part. You know what I mean?

17:40 You should have asked him, you want to buy this part from us? I told him what happened. But they were cool, by the way. He was really cool. Bryce is his name. Penhandle Pro Air. Very cool. But anyway, I just, you know how it is. You just feel like, you know how this stuff goes, right? It's like when we got our washing machine. We were trying to get our washing machine repaired. You know what I mean? It just. BS on top of BS on top of BS. And I just was ready for that to happen. And so I was so worried about this blowing and it was going to be loud in here and it's going to be hot if I turn it off. And they showed up and we're done in 30 minutes. They were here before the appointment window. They were here at like 1150. You know what I mean? And got it done really quickly. And I'm super, super grateful.

18:28 Oh, thank God for central heat and air, man. Oh, man, I will never grab that it's cold in here. Never, ever. Jesus, I will never grab that it's cold in here. Will never, ever. To go to bed like going, it's hot in here. It was so hot. I was like, no, I can't. I can't do it. There's a... I'm going to make a movie reference. It's so bad. It's not bad. I love this movie, but it's a Jay and Silent Bob movie. It's called Dogma. If you've never seen it. But Jason Lee is in it, and he's a, he plays a, he's not actually a, he's like, he's a demon, right? He's not actually, he was formerly an angel, and he was cast out of heaven. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He chose to not, he chose to play the middle. Oh, yeah.

19:13 He wasn't, he didn't want to be on the good or the bad. He just wanted to wait and see who won. So he got kicked out, right? And now he's got this grand plan to make the world come to an end. Yeah. breaks into this lady's house and turns the AC all the way down to, like, as low as it goes, and he has this thing he says. I can't exactly remember what he says, but something like, no pleasure, no rapture, no something, exquisite sins greater than central air. And I was like, yeah, I agree 100 % after this week. Yeah, look, when I got home from lunch, from eating lunch with Shannon, because she took me to lunch, which was awesome, and you had all the air on, I was like, did he leave? On purpose.

19:54 Oh, yeah. 100%. I want to get this house back to cool. Yeah. I was like, I'm not touching them. I'm just going to leave them. Yeah. So we need to get to some meat and potatoes. I think we've talked about some fairly decent stuff as far as relationships and battles we fight and how to love one another. But we really need to focus on God and our relationship with him. I guess I've kind of, right now, I feel like rather than attacking me, the enemy's attacking the people that I love, more than one, multiple. And so they're using that as a way, he's using that as a way to try to destroy me and deter us, not even just me, because it goes for you too. I guess that's when, I don't know. I don't know if that's a good sign or a bad sign. Yeah. Maybe.

21:00 I feel like on that note that what happened, I feel like this is helping your, I feel like that part needed to happen for you in a way that you needed it to happen. Yeah, well, and I'm not, I don't want to. Teeter on that too much because I'm not going to give details and that's really not, I'm not just specifically referring to that one thing. Obviously that's a part of it, but there's multiple other things that are happening that, you know, it just, you just look around and you go, okay, I see you. I see the enemy working. I can see it. I'm like, okay, so you're tired of picking at me because I won't give in. And so now you're picking on people I care about who will then, come and pick at me and just try to discourage. You see what I'm saying? He tries to perpetuate that cycle. And so at the end of the day, I'm like, I don't know if that's a good sign or if that's a bad sign.

21:59 It's a bad sign because you don't want them to suffer. Because they don't see it like you see it. You know what I'm saying? So that's the hard part, you know? I was thinking about this the other day. I don't know if I'm right on this or not. I really don't know. I feel like there's somewhere in the, in scripture where, and maybe it's not scripture. Maybe it's something I saw in a movie or something. I could be completely off base. So don't take this as any kind of fact or anything like that. But I was thinking about Jesus casting out demons, right? Because demon possessed people and he would cast them out.

22:40 And I have this funky recollection. of when you cast a demon out, it has to find somewhere else to go. So now it goes and possesses another body. And so it's like, which is better, right? You know what I mean? And so sometimes I feel like, for lack of a better description, I feel like staying possessed is better than letting someone else have to deal with the demon. Absolutely, yeah. Right? That's such a weird, complicated idea inside my head. But I'm like, it's like...

23:21 Like you could control it better than someone else could control it. I've been living with this forever. I can deal with this. You know what I mean? I'm doing okay. Or I'm surviving. You know what I mean? Yeah. And look, please understand, I'm not comparing myself to Christ in any way, shape, or form. But you think about sacrificial love, right? Christ took the punishment that we can't. take we're not capable of giving what he gave or doing what he did so that's kind of what i'm talking about it's like i'm willing to stand in front of the firing squad and take the bullets right for people that i care about right you know what i mean or instead of hurting my family just hurt me you know what i mean i can i can deal with this i've been dealing with it i've done been dealing with this stuff for a long time Uh, so I feel like we're just a hundred, a hundred places right now. We're not really one place. Right. I, I, I don't know. I want to feel like we're on some sort of a topical thing, but it doesn't seem like our conversation is developing. Right. You know, like that. But I think I don't even know why I got on it now.

24:35 So it's like, it's hard for my thoughts to, to process, but I was thinking about like, when Christ cast a demon out, is it better for, it's obviously good that that person got the demon cast out, but does that demon now go into somebody else? And now that person has to deal with demon possession. And so like, sometimes it's like, maybe it's just better if I go ahead and take the suffering and just, it's, I would rather just have be the one suffering than everybody else or other people around me to suffer. And so I guess that's kind of why the thought came up to me is like, is it good or bad that the enemy's decided to turn his attention to the people that I love? Because that makes me feel like, you know, I can deal with his attacks.

25:20 I've been doing it forever for a long, long, long, long time. You know what I mean? And I'm pretty used to defending myself against him, even though I get in dark ass places, you know what I'm saying? But it's not fair for you either though. You know what I'm saying? So it's not, it's, it's, it's time for you to rest, you know? But am I resting? Because. those that it still comes back to me yeah you know what i mean like i don't know it just it just i don't know it just kind of bothers me you know what i mean i even though i know the enemy's against all of us it's not like he's against me alone right if i could take it to protect everybody that i care about i would rather do that right you know i see what you're saying i see what you're getting at yeah when i was thinking about that's kind of what That's not kind of, that's exactly what Christ does for us. And we're supposed to be asked like Christ is possible. Right. You know what I mean? But I don't think it's like, I don't know. We need to allow Christ to do what he did. Right. We need to allow him to pay the price. Right. Because that's exactly what he did so that we could remain in the fold. In the family inheritance, you know what I mean? He already did it, so we should just accept it, receive it, and continue. It doesn't mean free pass to do whatever the heck we want, but we should cherish that. And because of that, we should do better. I think that's the dangerous

26:53 place that we get, is we feel like we have to live up to something. When the reality is, is he's not asked, he's like, I've already lived up to it, but you should be so happy and proud of that, that you do everything you can to do that too. Right. But not, not because you're going to be condemned if you don't. Right. But because you're going to disappoint yourself that you weren't able to live up. You know what I mean? Because you want to be as close to, you want to pay me back. You can't pay me back. Right. Yeah. Already paid. It's paid. It's forgiven. It's finished. Yeah. Right. I love that. It's finished. It is finished. It's finished. It's over, right? Let it be finished. We don't want to let it be finished. You know what I mean?

27:38 But I think that sometimes we take the advances of the enemy and the constant barrage and attacks as a negative sign. And it's really not. I mean, ultimately, it means something right, too, I think. I think that, yeah. It feels like, I don't know, I guess the enemy wouldn't fight for somebody that he didn't think he needed to fight for. If he already knows he don't have to fight for you, why would he? Right. Right. And trust me, he's not fighting for you for love. He's fighting for you because he hates you. Right. And he hates your creator. Exactly. Hates. And that's the strong, I mean, there's no stronger word. Hates.

28:25 God, he hates the creator and he hates the creator so much. He hates you because you created you too. Right. Right. So which means he probably hates himself. Right. Even because he was created by the creator also. And so here I go again, like making things more complicated because it's like, how can you love if you can't love yourself? Right. That's hard. Yeah. How can you give away what you don't have? That's true. How can you give forgiveness if you don't have forgiveness? That's true. That's true. How can you give love if you don't have love? How can you give money if you don't have money? How can you give water if you don't have water? You know what I mean?

29:06 I think that we think that God is expecting something from us when he's like, no, I'm expecting you to do what I've given you. Steward what I've given you. Use it to help. Use it to support yourself. Use it to help others. You know what I mean? Use the gift I've given you. Don't hold it, withhold it, afraid that you're not going to have enough. Don't withhold your love. You know what I mean? From others. Because it's not helping anybody then. Now it's just for you. And that's not how I designed that. He designed for us to be in community. And so I guess I hate the fact that I can see the people around me that I care about getting attacked. whether they believe it or not or know it or not. And I guess, I don't know why I feel this way. I always feel responsible. Because you're the dad. It's not just about being a dad, though. It's not just about being a dad. It's really not. I feel that way about everybody and everything. It's not just about being a dad. It's in all walks of life. Dad is only one part of what I am. It's only one title that I hold. I'm a dad, I'm a brother, I'm a son, I'm a friend. I'm an employee, a boss, a leader. You know what I mean? In all walks of life, I always feel responsible for everything. And if something fails, I feel like it's my fault, always. I don't know why. I take

30:42 responsibility all the time. I don't know. I would say that somebody said to me recently, you did what you were responsible to do. I said, don't, I thought in my mind, don't take being responsible as a requirement because you're not required to be responsible. Yeah. You can do the opposite. It's true. You know what I mean? If you choose to. Choosing to be responsible is an act of love. I do. That's true. You watched the movie Fences, right? Yes, I did. It's not the greatest movie to me. It's more of a Broadway thing. Or not Broadway. It's more of a... Is it Broadway? It's a play. It is a play. It's not really the... The moment where he has with his son, he's like, why do you hate me? He's like, did you eat today? Yeah. And in your mind, he's like, well, that's what you're responsible to do. He's like, no, no, no, no. Don't get this all messed up. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, I am responsible, but I don't have to uphold my responsibility. You know what I mean? I can walk away from it. People choose to walk away from responsibilities all the time. Yeah, absolutely.

32:00 You know? All the time. They don't care. So just because someone chooses to be responsible doesn't mean it's required. That's true. It's supposed to be required, but there's no law against not doing it. That's true. Right? So, well, I mean, I guess there is laws against not doing it. If you don't drink responsibly, there's a law against that or whatever. So I guess there are laws against them and stuff like that. But it's just, I don't know, man. Like, it kind of sounds selfish in a way because I would rather just take the heat than let the people I care about take the heat.

32:41 I can see that because I'm the same way, though. But it's how, how's that really helping? Because everybody has to grow. Yeah, because, I mean, we take more of the heat, but they're not learning anything or doing anything or learning responsibility or, I don't know. It's tough. It is tough. It just bothered me, and it was something I thought about, and, you know, I think it kind of goes into what I was talking to you about yesterday. And again, it goes into teaching the kids on Sunday. I felt like yesterday's lesson was like, it was really hard. It is a hard one. I think it's something that you could get very, very meaty with in an adult conversation. Yeah. But with kids, it's like, how do you land this idea?

33:36 Yeah, that's a hard one though. Where Christ has pulled the disciples together and he's like, hey, listen, I got to go to Jerusalem and I got to suffer bad. And I'm going to die. And then I'm going to rise again in three days. This is his best friends, man. These are the dudes he's been with for three years. Every day. Walking all over God's green earth. Yeah. Every day together. And you understand why Peter responds the way he does. And he pulls Jesus to the side. He's like, God forbid that that happened to you. You know what I mean? And then Jesus rebukes him and calls him the Satan. Get behind me, Satan, because you are offensive to me because you say for the things that be of the world and not the Lord. Right. Peter didn't even realize he was doing that. He knew what he was saying, but he was coming merely from a worldly perspective.

34:26 And that's what Christ was trying to say. And I think the only way I could think to tell him was like, you know. God has a plan and almost always we don't understand the plan. Right. But that doesn't mean it's not a good plan. Exactly. Just because it's not the good plan doesn't mean it's not the plan. Just because you don't think it's a good plan doesn't mean it's not a good plan. I love saying this because I just love how arrogant we are as a creature that we think we can question God, the creator of everything, that we can question his authority, that we can question his plan like he's not immensely and beyond us in so much. I do it too, and I'm not judging people for it, but I don't understand where we get the balls to say to God, that's a stupid plan. You know what I mean? Or why would you do that? You know what I mean? How much more can I say? He's the creator of everything, and he has everything mapped out, understood, known.

35:35 Inside of time, outside of time, and beyond. Crazy. And yet we can go, really? Really, God? That's what you thought? That's what you thought? I don't know, man. It bothers me. It bothers me when I do that. And look, I think God has given me the gift to check myself and be like, you're really going to ask me that question? Mm -hmm. And I go. Yeah, yeah, sorry, I forgot. I forgot who I was for a second. My bad, my bad, my bad. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Proceed, proceed, sir. But you know what? Job did it. Yeah, Job did do it. That's what that t -shirt's all about.

36:16 You know, why not you? Job chapter 40, he really just kind of lines out this conversation that he's like, you know, I just want to talk to God. I just want to ask him, like, am I not a good servant? I've never done anything wrong. Why? Why you got to let this happen to me? Yeah. And then like, I just love this. It's a different preacher that was preaching and he's just like, who are you talking to? Yeah. Do you know that I created you for this purpose? It's crazy. Because I made you to go through that. You forget that we are an example. Yeah. Right. And so the challenges that we're facing and that we're dealing with.

36:57 are meant for us to be an example to others you can do it the right way or you can do it the wrong way right it's like we go through things like you know some people are meant meant to hold these things to challenge other people but some people are not meant to to hold those challenges you know what i'm saying yeah like you can like i get it you know i'm saying like some people are you go through this to help someone to go through this right Not everybody's going to listen to that. You might help. There might be a hundred people going to that. You're probably only going to one's only going to listen. Maybe one or two. Yeah. And I think that goes into being relatable.

37:38 Right. And that's why I think every person has a voice and every person has a story and every story matters. I truly believe that because that's why I choose to do this because I feel like there are. Millions of people just like me who have dealt with things just like me that are just like me, that behave just like me. And I have only one thing, and that's to help. I want to be better. And I want to help them be better. And I want them to help me be better. That's why we grow relationships. You want to help that one person. If it gets to one person, then we're doing what we're supposed to be doing. Once you get to one, I want two. I was going to step on that earlier. You mentioned something, and I was thinking about you said the next 10 minutes.

38:31 Okay, when are the next 10 minutes? How about 20 minutes? How about 30 minutes? That really is a thing for addicts, right? Once they get into recovery, it's like I'm not going to say that I'm never going to use again, but I'm just going to go today. I'm going to make it one more day. You know, I'm going to choose today to be sober and we'll see what happens tomorrow. Right. And then the next day you keep saying that same thing. I'm just going to make it one more day. Right. I don't have, that's what we call eating an elephant one bite at a time. Oh yeah. Yeah. Instead of, I don't know how many times you've probably heard me say like, you can't. You solve all of it all at once. You have to take it piece by piece. Right. You can't think about 10 years down the road. Right. You can only think about today. You can only think about today. And yeah, you can establish things that will be further advanced when you get 10 years down the road.

39:29 Right. But you got to focus on today. If you're focusing too far down the road, you can't see the can in front of your foot. Absolutely. And if you're looking behind you, you're going to trip over the can. Absolutely. Right. Focus on the path in front of you right here, right now, today. Yeah. Right. And today I started my day in a messed up place. Right. Right. Pretty low in a lot of ways. Right. Didn't really know what I'm supposed to do with it. A lot of it's my own doing. A lot of it's my own thoughts. Right. A lot of it's my own. Uh, simplicity, honestly, like taking little things as a, as an offense, you know what I mean? Or an irritation. Um, I don't know why I hate the gym sometimes. I love being there. I love working out. I hate that place sometimes because People. People. Ew. No, it's not that. It's just sometimes I feel like God's trying to make me talk to people by putting them in places where I want to be and their fat faces where I want to be. I'm like, get out of my way. I want people to talk to me. They just look at me like, there goes that girl in the neckband. Why do you want people to talk to you?

40:52 Can I ask? Because I'm a talker. I want to talk to people. You don't even try to talk to me. You're my husband. I talk to you all the time. Please. We talk more on Monday nights than we do the rest of the week, period, combined. That's so very true. I know. I don't know. And that's why we need to talk more so we don't bring our BS to the table because this table stays clean. That's very true. Just wash it up when we get in. I don't know. I'm just, I don't know. It's just, it's such a contrast in style, right? Like you're such a social type of person. You want to socialize. I really don't. I don't care. I am. I'm like, I'd be Bob. Well, here's the other thing, man. I can't look. I, you may be a personal trainer. I don't care. Leave me alone. hey you shouldn't lift like you should lift this do that do this leave me alone I didn't ask for your help I got you I think I'm doing okay by myself no but it's happened before I can't stand that you know what I mean I didn't did we show up at the gym together because if we did then you can tell me but we didn't show up together leave me alone I don't know you don't talk to me and I know that's rude And I'm not really rude. If someone says what's up or whatever, I'll talk to them. But then you got those folks that don't

42:23 know personal boundaries and they will sit there and talk. Personal boundaries. Yeah, they'll sit there and talk too long. And you're like, bro, I've got a workout to get in. I don't have all day. Get out of the way. Yep, that would be me. There was that one guy. I haven't seen him there in forever. I haven't seen him forever, yeah. But, yeah, he just was one of those guys that, like, once you started talking to him, he won't stop talking. And I'm like, okay, bro, yeah. And I just walked away. I'm out. You know what I mean? Like, I can't. Like, again, I'm very aware of the fact that I get 45 minutes, right? That's my thought. I walk in here at 430.

43:06 I'm out the door at 515. I'm walking out. You know what I mean? I got 45 minutes to do whatever it is I'm going to do, right? And I try to get in at least three different lift sets. And then cardio, if I'm going to do cardio. If I'm not going to do cardio, I'll do six lift sets, five to six lift sets, depending on what I'm doing. Sometimes I'll do four sets instead of three. Sometimes I'll do 15 reps instead of 10. Or sometimes I'll do a build -up or I'll do a build -down where I'll start at 20 reps and drop down. Yeah. You know, I just try to shock my body, surprise it. Yeah. You know what I mean? And just, I don't know, just make it not think that it knows what's going to happen when we walk in the door. Right. You know what I mean? And that probably sounds funny, but there is a such thing as muscle memory.

43:51 That's why I think great guitar players are great, because their body just remembers where to be. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah, I get it. I think that about sports athletes, too. Right. They repeat the same motion so many times that it becomes natural. Don't have to think about it. Just do it. You know what I mean? And so I try to do things to make my body go, hey, this feels different. Why are we doing that? Isn't this Monday at 445? Don't we normally do this at this time? You know what I mean? Exactly, yeah. I get you. Because your body understands time also. So anyway, I just. I think there's an opportunity there, but I'm just not capable of seizing it. Yeah, I got you. You know what I mean? Some people are in there. You can tell the people are there trying to get attention.

44:37 It bugs the crap out of me. I totally get it. Men and women. Oh, I get it. I totally get it. I try not to get attention, and I think that's why I get attention. I know. Because I try not to get attention. I don't like it. I get it. Just leave me alone, man. I know. This is what the hood's always like. Right over the eyeballs. It's like because I don't want to see You can't see me And then you're like do I'm like look Put up the hood and you can be able to see me you come up over the back of my shoulder I'm not gonna see you anyway. I Look like a Jedi my stuff's old Yes, and it drives me nuts. What I don't like it. Why I Want to be able to see your eyeballs? We're not talking That's what you need to see my eyeballs for while I'm working out. I don't care. I need to see your eyeballs.

45:30 Just don't. What do you want to know if my eyes are wandering? No, I'm not really worried about that. Okay. No, I know you're not looking at someone else. You can barely handle this. I can't even handle that. I know. Shut the front door. Get out of here. I got you wondering every day. I think that if I do see somebody, it's because they walked in front of my face. It's not because I'm looking for them, you know, but I don't know. I just, I think that being in that, I feel awkward and I don't like that either. And I don't. You came up with like someone knocking on your door, your mom's. Flip our lid. You have no idea. Oh, no, I know. I know. People come to our house and it's like, oh, we're having coffee. I'm like, oh, we've got company. We don't talk. You don't.

46:37 I'm just a person. Hi. I'm not. I know. Trust me. I don't flip out. Sometimes you're just like, we, I just got home. I want to sit. I didn't even sit down yet. I haven't even sat down yet. Oh. There is nothing, literally, I will tell you the camera, there is literally nothing that I dislike more than pulling up to my house when I just got off of work. Been up since 4 o 'clock, 4 .30 in the morning. It's now 4 .30 or 5 o 'clock in the afternoon, and there's already somebody at my house. Get your face out of my house. Let me get in my house. change my clothes, have my dinner, and then you can show your face up. And it's not okay after that either sometimes. It depends on what I'm doing. No, it's not okay after that either. I promise you guys. Just call before you come, please. That's my thing. Like, I don't know. That's the way I was raised, literally.

47:41 It's like you don't show up unannounced. I won't show up anywhere unannounced either. Or ask to come. I know. I'm not. Can I come over? Can I come over and get that with you? Yeah, I know. That's tough, too. I guess. It feels presumptuous, I guess. You know what I mean? It's not like I want to do it every day. I just want to do it every once in a while. I don't, you know. Croc. Croc of crap right there. The more leash I give, the more you'll take. I assure you. I'll be like. Be like. Be like. It's what's wrong with my neck. I just want you to know that's what's wrong with my neck, guys. Because of him.

48:22 I'm just kidding. Front door. No, it's not. That was a joke. That was not a joke, though. I'm just telling you that was a joke. This episode has gone completely sideways. It's been sideways from the beginning. What the heck is going on right now? It's funny. You completely made me forget what I was going to say. I don't know. No, just showing up unannounced or even being like, hey, can I? It just feels. I remember being a kid, right? I remember when we played outside and everybody didn't stay in the house. And I remember the neighborhood kids and you go knock on the door. Can Scotty come out and play or whatever? You know what I mean? Like I remember those days. But it just was so ingrained that because I was. I would get grounded for long stretches of time where I didn't see daylight.

49:26 You know what I'm saying? For long periods of time. We got trouble. We got grounded. She's like, okay, God, go outside. Just go outside. Well, I had to be quiet or else I would get. No, we didn't get. We did. We did bad. Our stuff was not bad stuff. You would get whoopings for doing bad things, right? Or for. going overboard or whatever, but if I was grounded and I got caught outside of that groundedness, that was no fun. So I would just disappear. I mean, I'm felt like I, I think that's a lot of the reason that I'm the way I am, where I would like, I isolate so much because I, it's what I was taught, man. That's what I was taught. And it's, you know, I'm. I want to be different, but it's hard.

50:21 Yeah. Right? You have no idea how much I want to just, like, call up my friends and be like, hey, what are y 'all doing? You know what I mean? You want to go drink a beer or you want to go hit balls or, you know what I mean? I want to do that stuff. Can't. I can't. I can't even think about doing that. I don't know why. No, I can. You want to go get some golf balls? You won't even ask. You'll just go. Hey, we're going to get golf balls. Come on. You know what I mean? I'm going to be. I'm going to go. Yeah, I'm like that. I got some golf clubs. I'm so excited. I'm ready for it to cool off so I can go do that. No, can't right now. It's too hot. I'm too fat for all that. Yeah, me too. Me too. I can't swing a golf club for nothing, man. I'm terrible. I'm excited. I've been watching some golf, so I've gotten some nice golf tips. Yeah, seeing it and doing it are completely different. I got this.

51:11 I got the whole. Yeah, yeah. Feet, hands, and arms next to this. Starts in the arms. Lots of hips. It starts with your feet. It's all about the hips and the hands and the arms and everything. Yeah, I got this. I got this. I've been watching some videos. Yeah. We watched Scotty Scheffler win the tour championship yesterday. I do. I wish I could be different. I really do. But it's just so uncomfortable. It's all about the little steps. It's a fear of rejection. Oh. It's what it is. Because you know me. You know how I am in my mind. I have a vision already planned out in my head. And if I make that call and I get shot down, I'm just going to get my feelings hurt or get disappointed. And I don't want to deal with that. I'd rather just... not set up any expectation you know what i mean so i think that's more it than anything because i i faced a lot of that growing up too you know just i'm used to being alone and i'm also used to being rejected and so those two things combined make it really difficult for me to be comfortable stepping further and i'm way different today than when you and i first met yeah i mean Give me some credit where credit's due. Still not real happy when people show up without at least

52:42 asking. And they'll ask. They don't even ask. They just say, I'm coming over. I don't like that either. You're supposed to ask if you're welcome to come over. You know what I mean? But I guess with you, it doesn't matter. Because, yeah, of course, you're always welcome to come over anytime. I'm going to welcome him home. Anybody welcome him home. No. He's like, no. This is why we balance each other out, right? It's a good happy medium, right? It's a good happy medium, yeah. I guess. Let me ask Matthew. Hold on. But, yeah, I mean, I think that there is something to that, right? To me, there has to be some boundaries, right? It can't just be free -for -all, open -door policy anytime you want kind of thing because where's the room for us to have our life? If you have that. We go to bed together. Nope. He's like, nope. When we can't even touch each other in bed, that's not. We touch each other? A finger or a toe is not what I'm talking about. It's the same thing.

53:44 No. No. No. Maybe for you, but not for me. Hey, your pudge gets in the way, so that's your dog. He don't get up there until three or four in the morning. Whatever. That little thingy's always in the way. He's on my side. He doesn't snuggle your side. I'm like, ooh, good one on your side. This dude is a pillow dude. He drives me nuts. Put a pillow at the foot of the bed. I don't know. Drives me nuts. Are we ready for joke time? He's a cute dog. He really is. He's a pain in the butt, but he's cute. Like most children.

54:25 All children. Okay, let's see what joke I got. For you and you only, I couldn't put it down. Something about a book. I just read a book about a history of glue. I couldn't put it down. It was a real page turner. I don't know how to do it. I don't know which one it is. That's the one? That's the one. This is appropriate to the end of the conversation. That's the whole conversation.

55:24 Unknown quote. They don't know who it's quoted to. It is better to be hated for walking alone than loved for walking with fools going the wrong direction. Well, I'm not a fool. I didn't say you were a fool. I'm loved all the way around. You're definitely far more loved than I am. It's funny. For sure. Oops. I love it when that happens every single time. This really sounds like it's going to be a train wreck. Yeah. We'll see how it turns out. It was tough this week because there was such a roadblock in the emotional state and, like, really wasn't focused a lot. What I'm reading in the Bible right now, too, has been really, I've read the book of Joshua, which was good. About the first 10 chapters were really interesting, and then it started getting into how they divided the land, and it was kind of like, okay, man, okay. Why is this important?

56:44 I don't know. I don't understand. I think it's important, but I don't understand why it's important. Right. So I really, I finished reading it this morning while I was on the bike at the gym, and really nothing stood out to me except for, The verse, as Joshua was getting, life is coming to an end, and he said, as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord. And he was warning the people, don't turn away from God. Because if you know anything about the Old Testament, Israel, from beginning till Jesus came, they kept falling away, worshiping other gods and all that kind of stuff, which I think is what we still do today. The encouragement in that is God continued to rescue them, and he made a plan that was better than any plan that we could come up with. And he fulfilled that plan in the body of Jesus Christ and saved us all from the fulfillment of that law. And I think that's the encouragement of it. Other than that, man, I appreciate you guys being here. Thanks for joining our small group.

57:47 Share it with your friends. Invite them along. If you ever want to reach out to us, we've got the email. Best way is through the website. You can comment to us there. You can go to our TikTok, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, whatever, Spotify. You can comment to us. If you want to have meaningful conversation, join the conversation. Be a part of it in any way, shape, or form. Please let us know. We'd love to have you. If we can pray for you, if there's anything specific you need prayer for, please let us know so we can lift that up in prayer because we do believe that community and prayer work. Other than that, no matter how hard it gets, I'm not going to stop doing it. I'm not afraid of what the enemy does.

58:30 I know that even if it hurts, it's only temporary. I believe that my eternal life is going to be so much greater than my current life. Absolutely. And I'm thankful for that. And so because of that, I can continue to fight the good fight of the true faith. And for Bumper Cigar Wisdom, I'm John. I'm Terry.